Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
present your requests to God. Phillipians 4:6
Anxiety has run violently through our house over the last several days. It has caused tempers to be short, frustration levels high, and an all around unpleasant atmosphere. Chad and I have been anticipating something that will happen tomorrow and at this point, I am handing my anxiety over to God (again … I keep doing it, but the human side of me keeps taking it back).
embraced dealt with the decision that we needed to place Gmail in a therapeutic setting temporarily, we had expectations that most places would never fulfill. We knew what we wanted and where we wanted it. Our minds had drawn a picture of the perfect place (that does not exist, by the way) and we were set on him going to that one place.That one place, however, has a waiting list that is many months long. When we realized that this decision needed to be made for all of us, waiting that long was not realistic. The goal, after all, was to find the placement, get him there, get all of us the help we need, and ultimately, get him home quickly. This was not a decision for the long term, this was a decision that would, we pray, help my baby boy learn to compensate for his diagnoses and help us overcome some of the trauma that we have experienced.
It took me a while, but I came to terms with the fact that my first choice was not an option and I went back to the drawing board. Chad and I sat down with the therapy team and a family member that knows how these things work, we decided what our requirements were based on “must have” and “that would be awesome” and then we evaluated the places that were available, made a decision, and started the application process.
Monday, 1/24/11 the committee will review our application for Gmail to attend the therapeutic facility that we chose. They will determine whether or not he is a match for their center and whether or not he will be allowed to come. I will be storming the gates of Heaven asking God to oversee this team and their decision. If this is the right placement for Gmail, then I pray that the team sees that and admits him. However, if it is not the right place, I hope they see that as well. I think we, as a family, will be somewhat devastated if his application is denied, but I know that God is in control.
Please, join me in prayer that God’s will be done. Pray for the team that will be making the decision, pray for my baby boy in this journey since I know it will be difficult beyond belief, and pray for our family as a whole. I am still terrified, but I am also still giving my fear to God in exchange for power, love, and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7).